and all the beautiful people in it

the title is a reference to the beautiful lana del rey song, “god bless america – and all the beautiful women in it” … actually, it’s straight up lyrics.

i’m not tired. i’ve had two coffees. i refuse to be tired!

tw suicide;
my amitriptyline overdose anniversary is coming up. you know, the serious one? the one where i deliberately took more than the 26 years old at the time of his death (i was 26 a year ago) nick drake took and died, and the one where i woke up later in the sicu, intubated, with an iv in my jugular.

i still have this saved on my phone.

i am tired, of hurting, i suppose. i plan to stay alive! i have two beautiful purring daughters, xena and sabrina, my emotional support cats.

xena barely ate after that overdose until i was back. now, for clarity: xena normally has, well, quite an appetite!

i am editing a youtube video for the anniversary of the attempt (9/11/18) but i am not sure if it will be out in time.

i finally cleared every item off my scanner, and scanned some instaxes i had acquired:

as you can see, the photos are in varying quality.

that’s all for now. maybe a post later. MAYBE.


how many photos of otters did my mother take

(She took a lot of otter photos. I’m scanning some of them right now.)

There are three otter photos here, but I count at least five in this envelope, and I know there are more elsewhere. So many otter photos.
(sooc, only cropped)
Still no hefty updates here. I don’t have it in me right now.
Look at this glitter jar I made, though:
glitter jar 🙂 new improved tutorial coming soon!

 I have so many exciting plans, but also I am moving to near/possibly actually Boston soon (September 1st!) which is stressful and will help keep me busy all through all of August. I will be living with my boyfriend of over a year.

I adore scanning photos, taking photos, editing photos, and shooting video, and I have plenty of work in store for me. I managed to update a tinyletter between everything else – most likely that won’t be happening again for a while. I would love a PO box to list as my address for identity protection reasons.

I love documenting.

I have a passion for documentary photography, but also recording the many film photographs digitally that I get my hands on, from various family members (Are you my relative, and reading this? Want me to scan any family photos in extremely high quality with my fancy scanner? Please?)

Abu on Rosie’s lap, shot with my old dslr

I don’t really know what I am doing. I don’t think anyone does, though.


scans and things

hey guys!

I had a pretty eventful weekend. Aside from having a sleepover with Emma, I scanned a bunch of photos and went to hang out with my boyfriend and watch him (and some other people) do stand up comedy. He was really good! I’m not just saying that because he’s my boyfriend.

I have a lot of images to share – scans from yesterday morning, photos I took on the bus ride over there, and a couple of other random photos 🙂

Here are the scanned photos!

from my high school photography class: I took and developed this!

these are all 35mm film photos unless I state otherwise

I saw this in Boston last summer and had to take a picture!

my aunt Judy

my mom’s cat Momo



As stated above, these are all 35mm film photos taken by me.

I also scanned a few pages of sticker sheets!


Hello Kitty

Lisa Frank

Here are some photos I took on the bus:

the bus has a pink light!

Finally, here are some random photos from yesterday evening!

my boyfriend, making a weird face

jello – see below

That last photo is actually garlic mashed potato jello that my boyfriend’s friend made for thanksgiving. They offered me some to try, but I said no. They make weird kinds of jello a lot, apparently.

I have some stuff to do later today – paperwork, returning library books, and grocery shopping. So, I’ll leave this post at that!

Zelie Pie