a few videos and a little theme update-update

as promised, here are videos:

only three to update you on! see, i’m getting better at posting (plus my pc was broken and i couldn’t edit video…you know)

wordpress, this blog, despite being somewhere i have a decently large following, never occurs to me as a platform to update when i am having pc problems, or when big things happen. i wish this was the sims 3 and there was an auto option to write a blog post on my phone after important events! triumphant promotion! etc. if you played, you know. if you don’t and you don’t get it, i won’t be helping you with that, so move along.

i did update the actual theme of this site, just the homepage theme has links now… i don’t know, i guess i wanted a cute little menu at the top. not to mention access to posts and even archives are good and/or essential features of a blog. now, when you want to find that 2014 post about my eating disorder, now it’s easier. or you can. whatever. i don’t know.

i know someone is probably cleansing their space of my energy and spending time on protecting themselves from me, and it’s so, just, eyeroll! i would never attempt to impact someone negatively on purpose through my neopaganism practices and she knows that. then again, she is making all sorts of claims, so who knows what she’s thinking. if she weren’t probably trying to protect herself from imaginary parts of me, i wouldn’t even have her on my mind. that and it would be nice if she didn’t send me more surprise mail.

i know i sound harsh, and i am being harsh, but i treat people the way they are treating me. these days at least, and a while before that, with an interlude of bitchiness that she actually stood by me through.

so, the blog theme has been updated, and i intend to update it more soon. i’m just so tired. tired all of the time. my pharmacy finally, FINALLY has my iron tablets back in stock so i can take those daily again now; i’ve only been doing so for a few days. i hope this improves my energy. i went months without my iron medication.

i just want to be okay. i want to feel okay. so desperately.

so, after reinstalling windows, i lost some files, but not that many. for some reason, the 12tb drive of videos of casey and myself in full hd at 60fps that share a drive only with two other folders, one being my flickr archive, the other being…i don’t remember, but it is much less in quantity than the casey files.

i want the files that are important to me (and that includes my formerly on flickr photos!) so, i don’t really mind if i am hoarding data. at least my beautiful pc build is working again. i vlogged a bunch through the period when i was trying to fix it. i am editing that footage now, so you’ll see it… at some point.

i’m out of milk for my coffee, to buffer its acidity, which has a simple remedy (walking to the store 5 min away and buying a gallon of milk) yet i cannot bring myself to. perhaps the inspiration i need comes in the form of caffeine. however, i am also bummed that i can’t afford to buy two (they have a deal when you buy two, okay) of the pink energy drinks i love at the same time. the five dollar bill i have would cover one of those or the other, but not both. we both know i need the milk more and CANNOT justify the energy drinks in the same way. however, doing a trip solely for milk sounds exhausting.

so, there are things to talk about. things even i, big scorpio energy girl, am avoiding discussing. deaths. guns. more reasons not to go outside or leave my apartment. roe was overturned after being in place for about fifty years, i believe. i joined the satanic temple a while ago in order to protect my right to the holy ritual within satanism of abortion that they go to court to protect as a religious right of their members, so joining is really kind of just smart. i love the satanic temple. i haven’t looked too far into the rest of their ideology, besides knowing “satanic” is in the title of the religion, but left hand path religions never bothered me.

i guess i have to go buy some milk before it gets dark outside.

xoxo
z

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