so, i stopped identifying as wiccan (due to the racist origins of the word), but i am still a witch. a neo-pagan. i am also glitch vhs back on my bullshit, bitch, biscuit, bitch
i wrote something about scorpios of all things earlier and found that my passion for writing has been reignited, in typing at least. i wish for a typewriter (a pink typewriter) that i can click-clack on the keys of. that i can film myself click-clacking on the keys of. my blue switch mechanical keyboard is simply not enough!
anyways, there are other things to share, like youtube videos i’ve made (as i’ve mentioned, i’m b.o.m.vhs.b.), like i said, only TRULY this time.
gosh. looking back, i even already referenced the title of this post (a former instagram username); my memory is so shit! it’s okay though, c’est la vie.
here are the recent videos i mentioned in passing:
anyways. those are the new videos.
i feel like the katamari damacy king of the universe. destroying all the stars and then especially killing time and distracting and talking too much. distraction/surveying.
i have more, but, hmmm, let’s see. i am so tired of this. all of this, this life stuff. i mean, it’s fine, i’m not going to attempt suicide or anything stupid like that, but fuck, is it hard.
this living thing.
people ask me why i’m depressed. i don’t know what to tell them, except that wellbutrin takes me to a significantly less depressed state (think crying in bed rather than crying on the floor face down with snot in my hair.)
i’ve been enjoying online communities, and i highly recommend them during this isolating pandemic. i mean, it’s okay, but my discord and twitter especially have been bringing me a sense of community. instagram too, i suppose, although i feel that i simultaneously basically hate instagram for being so sex-worker-unfriendly.
listening (telling you like it’s livejournal in 2005) to perfect by mason and princess superstar.
this synth part, so cool! whoo!
lately i have been listening to a few songs on repeat. do you want a mix cd curated for you, by me? or better yet, a cassette.
perfection, ha ha.
yes, the parts in italics are lyrics. yes, i’m brutally obvious. also why yes, i am the cliché child of harley quinn and taylor swift.
i hit my head, somehow, perhaps from fainting from malnutrition? and now it is sore. a bump swells.
the skin on my face itches in the way that a deep need to get to something underneath to scratch an unsatisfiable itch is there. i know from experience that acting on the itching leads to scratching leads to picking leads to blood. blood, red blood, bright then if i don’t clean it with stinging alcohol it’s a brownish color.
the maroon of the vial of blood in my minifridge tells me it partially oxidized, even in a medical vial.
i did not pay for that, lol. it was free blood. i mean, technically.
i told someone i wouldn’t disclose the details though. for secrecy reasons, of course. what else?
hmmmm…. i wish i had cool pictures to show you all. i’m sure i do, but what use are they? do i upload old randoms or recent snaps?
this game is cute and fun and makes me want a controller that works for pcs. unfortunately, those cost money…especially the pink ones! rude.
so there’s (pretty much) proof that i am the chaotic good i claim to be. a turbulent enfp, if you will! if you put weight into such things.
so, i guess, that’s most of it since we last talked.
i have been wearing boots in the snow too much. i have been drinking coffee and smoking weed, like always
what is a paragraph? i’ve never heard of such a thing! ok, jokes aside, i love u all.