hi, Sugarette dot net. My Sugarette readers,

I tried to carve out a space for myself elsewhere on the internet, a space that could basically be entirely mine, a wordpress dot com blog, and that was costly…and eventually I moved my blogging/posts to my patreon, and stopped blogging publicly. I set it up so that both sugarette dot net and zelie dot co domains pointed towards my patreon. They still are…maybe not for long.

I have one patron already! It helps. If you can, if you want to, feel free to consider becoming my patron, and as a aresult seeing more content from me, but I’m not here solely to plug my means of making money.

I want to make this blog more about mental health again. I miss having a reader base that so heavily consisted of neurodivergent individuals. I want to provide tutorials for coping techniques, etc.

I want to write more – I’ve been shooting some footage and many photographs, mostly with my dslr, although some with my slr…I want to write more – more poetry, more blog posts, etc.I might put my (depressing) poetry on cherrymess and allpoetry, but really I want it on patreon, so, there’s that.

So I’m sat here drinking coffee, and I put not even vanilla but chocolate ensure in it in lieu of creamer or milk. My mind is going too fast, in the anxious way. I am trying to save things from falling apart but I feel like I, myself, am falling apart. If I return to the hospital, my boyfriend will be at work now, and harder to reach by phone anyways. Most hospitals do not allow much cellphone access. I don’t even know if I need the hospital, or respite, or anything – maybe something, but a higher level of care, maybe not.

I’m too fuzzy for much writing right now, but here are a couple of photos of my new pin board:

comment if you want to know who a pin is by and I’ll dig up the info!

As you can see, I also now have a gaming table. There have been quite a few changes in my life! I’ll update you all more later – either here or in a more personal blog setting that I’d link, as always

My mental health is so weird lately. I am a mix of anxious and depressed, usually one moreso than the other but it varies which is on top. My eating disorder is, for lack of a better word, ??? right now.  Other things are also bad. I’m safe, I’m managing, it’s just bad.

I have been playing kind of a lot of mtg and mtg arena. It’s a time waster (and in the case of the paper cards, a money drain), but a fun one.

Okay, I don’t have energy to write more right now, but I do have the spoons to work on other BTS online/pc related work in order to be more ready with good updates when I come back to post here again.

I love you all.

xoxo,
Z